This Day, That Year.
It was like any other day.Unlike the birth of the other eminent personalities, this one was not marked by any unusual and extraordinary happenings in the world.There were no wise men from the far east to visit me.The stars shone normally. There was no solar eclipse.There were no Saas-Bahu soaps on T.V .Nostradamus couldnt prophesize me.John Lennon was killed by a madman that year though.(i know what you are thinking...'Ek gayaa to ek aayaa'. :D) However it didnt begin on a very happy note.I was born naked and wet.And then I was spanked on my butt.Gosh! Have a heart people!! And people all around started giggling and smiling and exchanging complements .Poor things..they didn’t know what was coming.But paradoxically the world has been a better place to live in ever since.
I grew up by feeding on plants and animals.My folks periodically reminded me that to survive in this dog eats dog world,you need to work hard .Now this was something that I couldnt really appreciate.They had a hard time trying to teach me the English alphabet.'A' for apple they said and I didnt let them rest in peace until they gave me an apple.And similarly 'B' for ball.And they let the teachers do the honours when it came to 'E' because buying an elephant was out of question. However the teachers conned me by saying 'E' for egg-Something which I hated bigtime.Very soon I was encumbered with the exploits of Jack n Jill, little Johnny, Baba black sheep etc., etc., And year after year I celebrated my birthday and kept putting on weight.I felt happy on this day - I would always supply a wrong figure to my mom and end up saving 50 odd toffees after distributing the rest(hee hee hee) - I was exempted from doing my homework and wouldnt need to stand out of the classroom - My biology teacher would not slap me for not being able to remember the scientific name of a remote rodent which dwells in central parts of Zambia or some shit like that.And the birthday boy always got to bat first in our version of cricket. And all the neighbouring children would get envious of my newly acquired pink and yellow outfit.
Twenty three years have passed since then.My achievements so far - Breaking innumerable glass panes of my neighbour while playing gulli cricket,pouring sand in the petrol tank of one of my teachers scooty whom I disliked more than Kareena Kapoor , cutting classes in school and watching Urmila dancing away to glory in Rangeela again and again, eating supari in classes without getting caught, surviving a fortnight without taking a bath in Chennai ,taking a 'u' turn on my bicycle handsfree, sleeping non-stop for 18 hours at a stretch---Oops quite a few, quite a few.I'm not that bad after all..Neways Bohr,Schrodinger,Einstein and the like have already accomplished all the stuff I planned to contribute for the progress and prosperity of the world-which then leaves me with the task of rescuing the world from one disaster or another.Something which Mithunda and superstar Rajnikant have been doing for years.
I grew up by feeding on plants and animals.My folks periodically reminded me that to survive in this dog eats dog world,you need to work hard .Now this was something that I couldnt really appreciate.They had a hard time trying to teach me the English alphabet.'A' for apple they said and I didnt let them rest in peace until they gave me an apple.And similarly 'B' for ball.And they let the teachers do the honours when it came to 'E' because buying an elephant was out of question. However the teachers conned me by saying 'E' for egg-Something which I hated bigtime.Very soon I was encumbered with the exploits of Jack n Jill, little Johnny, Baba black sheep etc., etc., And year after year I celebrated my birthday and kept putting on weight.I felt happy on this day - I would always supply a wrong figure to my mom and end up saving 50 odd toffees after distributing the rest(hee hee hee) - I was exempted from doing my homework and wouldnt need to stand out of the classroom - My biology teacher would not slap me for not being able to remember the scientific name of a remote rodent which dwells in central parts of Zambia or some shit like that.And the birthday boy always got to bat first in our version of cricket. And all the neighbouring children would get envious of my newly acquired pink and yellow outfit.
Twenty three years have passed since then.My achievements so far - Breaking innumerable glass panes of my neighbour while playing gulli cricket,pouring sand in the petrol tank of one of my teachers scooty whom I disliked more than Kareena Kapoor , cutting classes in school and watching Urmila dancing away to glory in Rangeela again and again, eating supari in classes without getting caught, surviving a fortnight without taking a bath in Chennai ,taking a 'u' turn on my bicycle handsfree, sleeping non-stop for 18 hours at a stretch---Oops quite a few, quite a few.I'm not that bad after all..Neways Bohr,Schrodinger,Einstein and the like have already accomplished all the stuff I planned to contribute for the progress and prosperity of the world-which then leaves me with the task of rescuing the world from one disaster or another.Something which Mithunda and superstar Rajnikant have been doing for years.
posted by Dijas at 6/21/2005
5 comments
